Wanting good government in their states, they first established order in their own families; wanting order in their home, they first disciplined themselves.
Confucius
Soon after our fourth baby was born we had planned to surgically insure that we would have no more children. We had 2 girls then 2 boys- the perfect family.
Before we could take this step the Lord intervened and we were relieved of part of our business which made it economically unfeasible to carry out our plan. At least one person offered to make us a loan to pay for Breadwinner's procedure. But the hole in our bank account served to encourage us to reconsider our plans and decide if they were truly in line with the Lord's will for our family.
I clearly remember one night when #4 was about 2 months. He was an ornery baby. He cried easily and wanted to nurse constantly, especially in the evening. I thought perhaps he had colic or some other health related issue. Turns out babies often display parts of their coming personalities early on. Even as he cried, Breadwinner and I looked at each other and declared we could not stop with this one. Even through his orneriness he was a great blessing.
There were other encouragements around this time that helped us form our philosophy of family. My dear friend Deb lent me a CD of a preacher named Voddie Baucham. I was truly convicted by his message. God calls children a blessing. Why would I want to limit the blessings God had for me? It made me question all my preconceived (hah!) notions about "family planning". If God can do anything, including allowing me to conceive while on any attempt at birth control, why do I think that I should be the one that is making that decision?
It was also around this time that while researching forms of birth control we found that birth control pills can cause abortions. We felt shocked, saddened, let down, and embarrassed. Before we had decided to use the pill in the first few years of our marriage we had discussed it with our Pastor in marriage counseling and my trusted gynecologist. As we both have degrees in biology we thought we had all our bases covered and knew what we were doing. No one had ever even hinted that by using the pill we could have killed our own baby. Randy Alcorn wrote a book called Does The Birth Control Pill Cause Abortion. You can find it here in a condensed form.http://www.emmerich1.com/Does%20the%20Birth%20Control%20Pill%20Cause%20Abortions%207th%20edition.pdf
Breadwinner was all for having a passel more kids. I, although convicted at heart, was a bit reticent. What about all my plans and dreams and projects? More kids would definitely cramp my style. Didn't kids cost a lot? Would we have the money to bankroll my plans and dreams and projects? If we had more kids we wouldn't fit into our truck that pulled our 5th wheel travel trailer. Each new baby meant about 4 months of all day sickness for me at the outset. My grumblings to myself went on and on. Then my friend Linda lent me a book called Be Fruitful and Multiply by Nancy Campbell. I took a good hard look at myself and finally saw my self-centeredness. I wasn't thinking about loving the Lord and considering His plan for my life, I was thinking about what would cause me the greatest pleasure and ease. I realized that on my current trajectory I would never have been a consideration for the Hall of Faith in Hebrews 11. If I truly believed that God was in control of all the universe then I needed to live that way. By faith.
Opening our bedroom to the Lord was very freeing. We are open to the "rewards" God has for us. I no longer have to consider if the time is right or whether we are "ready" to have another baby.
Since we made this decision in faith we have seen God's hand on our lives more than ever. He truly provides all our needs. Faith in one area of ones life tends to radiate outward like the ripple from a pebble in a pond. It hasn't ensured our lives are trouble free, it just reminds us we have reason to sing His praise as we tread the rocky road.
God has allowed us to be involved in His plan for His creation. He has given us warriors to train up to follow Him. Can there be any greater joy? (3 John 1:4)
Our quiver holds potential arrows for God's army awaiting being loosed on targets we could never reach.
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